Dec 7, 2016

Random Post: Keep it or leave it?

What would you do about a friend that you think might lead you to bad things or negative influences? Would you keep them or leave them? What would you do about a friend that you feel so much tired of because they treat you nicely only when they need something from you? Would you keep them or leave them? Moreover, what would you do about a friend, that you want to keep going in a right way, suddenly asked you to lie, and impolitely involve you to their relationship and family drama? 

I know, I am a hunk of flaws myself. I make mistakes, I forget things, no one is perfect. But, if we only think from one's perspective, we won't make progress. In order to be better, to live a much better life in the world and akhirat, we need to consider about the other's perspectives as well, we need to choose and make decisions.

I don't think there is anyone I would particularly refers to, nor expecting anyone to read this. I just want to share this experience to any of you, who probably came by reading this post, and hopefully can take this as a lesson. This is a story I've been keeping in for quite sometimes, because I've been arguing with my own self whether to write this or not, by keep doing what I've been doing, silent, because actually I'm afraid this story would lead to different understanding. But, whatever, I've got nothing to lose, I'm gonna write it anyway.

Do you have someone who is so much in your hood, when you share the same interest, endless topic being talked when you meet, and can relate to many things between each other, then you naturally became friends? I bet you have at least one in your life. As for me, I have, and actually more than one, I clicked that way to several people. I basically looove to make friends, meet people, get to know people, but I feel this kind of hood not just to anyone, only to certain people, which most of them are now such a dear friend. Well yeah, from all of  them, there's one person I used to call a good friend. I'm not saying that we're no more, but at least, we used to be very close. Until the moment I think I could not handle things between us anymore, I decided to stay out of everything.

I've never felt like soooo much irritated before when someone puts me in difficult situation. I'm not gonna tell everything in details, but we were close as much as sleepover in each other's house, as much as I drove her to her house which is more than 15 km away from my house, back and forth. Not just because she's a friend, but she was living alone here to study, so, I was kinda care about that too. She also ran an online shop, when one day my other friend told me about ordering a custom made item to her, but it came out in a wrong size. After that, my friend gave her the new fabric, but then she missed the deadline, said she will send it with courier but said the package got stuck and never arrived, she gave so many doesnt-make-sense reasons, don't know if she really send it, but, she didn't finish the order until today, even if it's paid and not refunded. Not hating, not expecting anything back, just regretting her attitude so much.

Moving on to the real story. The problem started when I let her borrow one of my shirt. To be honest, the shirt was not really mine, it was sponsored, and I haven't reviewed it. I told her to return it as soon as possible after the event because I need to do my job. But at first, I didn't rush her or anything, I even told her that I will pick it up myself at her house (even if she's the one borrowing) but we never find the right time because I think, okay, she was busy, even I told her just to put it in front of her house, she didn't reply.

Okay, next of the next day, we discussed about when can I get my shirt back, she got annoyed with me maybe because she was extremely busy but I keep nagging her to return it, then she told me that she will send it with courier. Now that's when I started getting really angry. Like seriously? She's only 15 km away. I didn't even hesitate to send her from my house-to her house-back to my house before. I was so angry cus I got remembered when she wanted to send my friend's order but said the package got stuck and never arrived. I wouldn't mind she took it or lose it if I buy the shirt myself, but this time is different. It's sponsored, I owe a review to the company, I couldn't lose it. I reach my limit, I told her to return it directly to my house. This end up with the security guard which is only 5 meters away from my block, knocked my door, hand me a paper bag, with my shirt inside, wrinkled like a ball, and smelled so terribly bad. I felt like I got slapped hard in the face. I didn't do anything but took a deep breath, and istighfar. Yaa Allah.

Long story short before all of this arose, her mom didn't like her relationship. I was kinda shocked because her mom called me crying, like literally, crying about her being against the family, and asked if I can change her mind. Well, I could only listen. I'm not in the capacity to decide who can date her nor having the rights to say anything about the relationship. I mean, I'm just a friend, I'm nobody to be put into her relationship problem, but she continued the relationship without letting her parents know, well, I can only gave her advice not to make everything worse.

Few days after the security guard knocked my door, I decided to not say anything. I didn't wanna meet her for a while. I was busy myself when suddenly her number appeared calling me but missed for few times. I was like,

' what?!'

My brain kept telling my hand, 'don't answer! don't!' I rejected the call.

She called again, my heart was like, 'It's already the third call, could she be in danger? What if it's just an unnecessary call? Oh, come on, just listen what's the damn matter', then I answered.

It's only been a few days since she treated me that way, I barely listened cus actually I'm not in the mood of talking to her, I wanted to forget what she did to me. Guess what? She asked me where I was that time, she told me there's a parcel she bought from a fashion e-commerce that she ordered using her bf's account, with her bf's name on the package, arrived at her house, received by her big sis who was currently coming, and so, she confused about what to say because her family only know that she's no longer in a relationship. Ohhh...kay, let me catch my breath. So, she asked me whether she could pick me up in my house that time, to go to her house, to help her explain to her family that I was the one who ordered, that I borrowed her bf's account to order.

Okay, so far, I couldn't even believe she actually said that to me. It's exactly like what I expected, an unnecessary call. I cringed when I heard her talking. I said no way, of course! I told her I was out of town, I was not in my house that time but she insisted asking when will I comeback. No! I didn't want her to pick me up, moreover, asking me to lie to her family? Hell no! I couldn't stand any longer I ended the call. Few days before, I asked her to send my shirt over to my house and look what she did to me, now she insisted to pick me up at my house, and it's totally fine for her to go all the way to my house. I really have lost my patient, I told her to fix everything up on her own, and to not involve me in her relationship problem. I mean, don't tell me what to do.

I think I was being too rude myself that time. But, after the call, I was like, so much irritated I don't wanna be fooled anymore, so tired of all this drama. This problem is only a few of so many dramas that I experienced from her. Since then, I prevent myself from meeting her, nor talked to her because I'm afraid that I would only think negatively, or talk bad. I decided to stay out of everything, that involves her.

She probably not realizing about why I became this way. A month later, she called me few times asking me to meet her, but I never said yes, I went to Bandung a lot that time. One day I needed to pass a message to her, I asked a friend instead to tell her so I don't need to talk to her. Told my friend I lost her number because I got my phone on reset. She then updated her status after my friend contacted her that I was doing some silly method to prevent talking to her. Actually yes, I know I was being silly, why? not sure, just don't wanna talk to her. Because, few minutes before she updated, I got two calls from her mom that I purposely didn't answer so that the daughter and the mom can finish the problem themselves. I was talking alone, now who's being silly? How can she care much about me being silly, I'm not important, I'm nobody. Just care more about her mom, who are million times more important, who probably called me asking about her daughter.

I actually feel sorry because I was kinda neglect her, but I just can't stand it anymore, I'm too tired of her. I don't want this unhealthy friendship goes on. I don't know if she knew that she did wrong to me, or her mother, cus she never said sorry. It was a habit that she almost never ever ever, said sorry, whenever she made mistake. But, that's okay. It's no longer a problem. She's now just like a normal person to me, whom I don't meet much like any other person I've met in my life. 

Now, I just feel my life much more peaceful, and all praise to Allah, after just keeping myself sabar, not complaining much, He gave me a multiple times better replacement. Alhamdulillah, now I get to know some amazing new friends, with amazing experiences, who are not demanding me to be perfect, or looking at each other based on popularity, or what we have. They just accept me for who I am, and I accept them for who they are. I became friends with anyone whose personality clicked me, and they just clicked me better like we've known each other for long. Some of them have also gained much more than me, a mom to be, a doctor, a wife, bloggers, entrepreneurs, etc. but still keeping their head low, not having that superior feeling.

I don't care if there are people who think that I only want to be friends to certain people who are pretty or popular. They just dont know me, and I don't click with negativities. It's scary to be friends with people who has that kinda way of thinking. I'm just feeling really thankfull that my friends now could gave me a lot of life lesson I can learn to, and lead me to a more positives influences ahead, insyaAllah. To her, I only wish nothing but goodness will come to her always. Soar with her own ability, and hope she succeed, amin. 

Remember, if you want to know someone's personality, look at their friends. Friends give huge impact in your life. Look for the good ones, that makes you remember Allah, and you shall have a good life, insyaAllah. 

Thanks for reading. Love, Lia <3


Nov 28, 2016

LIA LOOKS: That Sporty Casual Day

Catch up over lunch today with a friend. Nothing is apparently gonna be talked, we just wanna meet becuse we've missed each other too much alrdy. I chose to be casual and easy. With shirt dress, ripped jeans, slingbag, and sneakers. I'm sure everyone have done this style so much, but in my case, I mostly choose those simple feminine look, I rarely dress up this boyish, so, this time, I'm sharing mine as I'm being one today! Alhamdulillah, it turns out real nice on me because of the super comfy shirt dress from! <3

Shirt Dress | (Instagram: @kamicinta)
Jeans | H&M
Sneakers | NIKE Roshe One Retro

Nov 25, 2016

Keep Calm and Shop Online because It's Harbolnas 2016!

Hai, Assalamualaikum!

Finally, sampai lagi kita pada bulan menuju penghujung tahun 2016. Nah, sudah hampir pergantian tahun nih, masih belum pernah belanja online? Waduh, kemana aja shay! Okay gak papa, jangan sedih, kalau menurut pepatah jowo, 'better late than never', jadi buat yang baru baca post aku kali ini, beruntunglah karena belum terlambat bagi kalian untuk tau tentang Harbolnas, yaitu Hari Belanja Online Nasional 2016!

Tahun kemarin aku juga sudah pernah mengulas tentang harbolnas di sini. Nah, gak jauh beda dari tahun lalu, kali ini aku juga akan menceritakan pengalamanku tentang belanja online, terutama kepada kalian yang belum pernah mencoba ataupun punya pengalaman buruk terhadap belanja online.

Berdasarkan survey ala ala ku terhadap teman-teman dan orang di sekitar, faktor utama yang menyebabkan mereka tidak ingin berbelanja online adalah masalah kepercayaan. Sebagian besar orang ragu-ragu, dan takut apabila transaksi yang dilakukan berujung pada penipuan. Oh yeas dear, I can totally relate, it'd be real s*cks if it happens to me. But, alhamdulillah, had never and hopefully won't ever happen. Faktor keduanya, tentu karena kebanyakan orang takut kecewa nantinya kualitas produk yang diterima gak sesuai dengan yang ditampilkan di foto, karena saat belanja online kita gak bisa nyobain langsung barang yang akan dibeli. Banyak lagi faktor lainnya yang membuat orang ragu-ragu untuk belanja online.

As for me, I'm kind of a perfectionist. Terutama kalau berkaitan dengan fashion items. Kalau mau beli sesuatu, bakal lama banget waktu yang aku perlukan untuk mempertimbangkan banyak hal hanya untuk satu produk. Mulai dari kualitas, kesesuaiannya dengan harga, kegunaannya, materialnya, ke mana akan dipakai, dan banyak hal lainnya. I would look at it over and over, compare it from one place to another, from one site to another website.

Beberapa tahun lalu ketika online shop udah mulai bermunculan, memang gak semua olshop bisa dipercaya dan bikin aku tertarik untuk beli. Kemudian trend e-commerce pun mulai masuk ke Indonesia, dan inilah awal dari racun belanja mulai merasuki jiwa-jiwa perempuan yang lemah.

Awal mula tetarik belanja online yaitu ketika pertama saya dapat invitation mail untuk membuat akun di ZALORA, and as people start to notice them, saya mulai tertarik dengan penawarannya, terutama pada bagian FREE Shipping (for sure!), dan retur barang plus refund 100% dalam jangka waktu 30 hari sejak pembelian apabila barang gak sesuai atau gak pas ketika dicoba, then I said, this is it! The solution for a safe and enjoyable online shopping.

Brand yang sudah bergabung di ZALORA ada ribuan mulai dari brand internasional, sampai brand lokal favorit kalian, jadi buat orang semacam aku yang banyak pertimbangan, gak usah repot mondar mandir lagi karena satu tempat sudah lengkap menyediakan banyak pilihan. Berdasarkan pengalaman yang lalu saat belanja di ZALORA adalah packagingnya aman, dan bisa digunakan ulang untuk mengirim retur barang. Kamu bisa baca lebih lengkap lagi tentang pengalaman belanjaku di ZALORA dari post pertamaku tentang harbolnas tahun lalu melalui link yang sudah aku berikan di awal tadi.

Satu hal lagi yang paling bikin seneng saat belanja online di e-commerce adalah, banyak voucher yang ditawarkan berupa code yang bisa di input saat akan check out. Jadi kita bisa dapetin barang dengan brand yang sama dengan di mall plus extra discount yang belum tentu bisa didapat kalau kita beli di mall.

Nah, serunya lagi nih, banyak SALE yang diadakan e-commerce pada periode dan moment tertentu, salah satunya menjelang akhir taun seperti sekarang, akan ada satu hari khusus yang menjadi Hari Belanja Nasional, yaitu tanggal 12/12 nanti. Para e-commerce serentak mengadakan BIG SALE dalam rangka memperkenalkan belanja online yang aman, dan terpercaya kepada konsumen di era serba digital sekarang ini. Jadi, gak perlu ragu dan khawatir lagi yah.

Gadget. Like seriously, now almost everyone has it. Use it right, use it well. Belanja online pun ga perlu ribet lagi dengan adanya gadget. So, jangan sibuk main sosmed terus terusan ajaaa, gunakan juga untuk mengefektifkan kegiatanmu dengan kemudahan belanja online karena sekarang ini belanja online bisa dilakukan dimana saja.

ZALORA has everything fashionable that I need! Buat kamu yang suka belanja online seperti aku, jangan lewatkan momen Hari Belanja Nasional atau Harbolnas di ZALORA ya! Klik link berikut dan segera cari tau lebih lengkap supaya barang yang kamu inginkan gak terhempas diambil orang lain apalagi kalau sale nya sampe 70%, oh no.

Selamat berburu diskon dan selamat berbelanja yah!

Love, Lia <3